Feelings vs. Truth

In my absence from the blogging world these past week or so, I have been under a great deal of stress with things that are completely out of our control. However, even when we know that they are out of our control...they can still take control of us.

As hard I fought against the stress of the situations, the discouragement and minor depression began to creep in. Add the fact that we didn't see sunshine in Arkansas for over 2 weeks due to rain, rain, rain and very dark, dreary days...my mood was getting very dark.

When I get this way, I don't want to talk to anyone but of course, life continue to move on whether you do or not. You will be put in places and situations that you HAVE to put on a "happy face", smile, talk, laugh and act like all is well with the world...when in fact...IT ISN'T. I find myself doing this and hiding behind a "happy face" so the world doesn't know my business.

If you have never allowed a situation of life to control you, discourage you or cause you to enter into some level of depression...then, you might take your loved ones actions personal when they are not meant to be. When we are with our loved ones, our family, in our own home...we tend to be ourselves without the phony facade. If your loved ones don't understand what you are going through...they might be offended by your actions or lack of.

By Friday, I wasn't smiling but functioning day by day. When I was alone, I was deep in thought and the war was raging in my mind between what I was "feeling" and the truth.

I went to Jonesboro to take my oldest son, Brandon, his jacket and shirt he left at the house earlier in the week and this gave me plenty of time alone to just think.

During this entire "dry" time in my life, I have filled my mind with praise and worship music, prayer and some reading of the Word. I can't focus very well during this time to spend much time reading...so, I don't. I would go to bed at night with my iPod playing through my headphones...filling my sleep with praise and worship music. However, I would wake up the next day in the same "funk" as I went to sleep in.

Driving back from Jonesboro, I had a notebook with me, so I wrote down words that described how I was "feeling" that very moment. I started to scan the page and post it but too lazy to go do it...so, here is what I wrote down. As I was writing the words down on the left side of the page of how I was feeling, my thoughts would immediately go opposite and I wrote these down on the right side of the page.

Physical vs. Spiritual...Feelings vs. Truth

Beat down / My joy comes from the Lord

Great sadness / My hope is in Him

Overwhelmed / I put my trust in Him

Defeated / When I am weak, He is strong

Angry / Be angry and sin not

Hurt

Anxious / Be anxious about nothing

Minor Depression / I am more than a conqueror

Doubtful / Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean
not unto your own understanding

Tired & Drained / I will give you rest

Alone / I will never leave you nor forsake you

Emotionally dry / He is the fountain of living water

As my flesh was screaming out my weaknesses, my spirit was screaming out the Truth...God's Word.

Did I immediately feel better? No!

I sought the advice of a very dear friend, wise counsel, godly person that afternoon and they confirmed what I already knew. That there will be times in our lives that we go through dry spells, when we feel alone, that God is not there, when our prayers aren't being heard, when we feel there is no hope for our situation BUT, that is not the TRUTH. The truth is...God is actively working in my life, my family, my situation and He is still right there by my side and at times, He is carrying me when I am to weary to walk on my own.

This time, I didn't feel that my prayers weren't being answered or that God wasn't there with me but, I knew I was in a dry season. This is the biggest difference that I've seen in this time and other attacks from the enemy in the past.

It was confirmed to me that I knew the truth and I was refusing to buy into the lies of the enemy during this period of my life. Now, I just have to wait until my flesh grabs a hold of the truth.

By the way, I am feeling much better starting on Saturday. I still have my "quiet" moments but the joy of the Lord is returning to my flesh.

Nehemiah 8:10b
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength."

Psalm 33:20
We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield

Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

II Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

Psalm 39:7
"But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you.

Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Hebrews 13:5b
God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

John 7:38
Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him."

Romans 8:37
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Please pray for me as the stress has begun to affect my heart again. It is skipping beats more frequently and makes me tired easily.

THIS TOO SHALL PASS!

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

It's A Brand New Day!

Lamentations 3:21-25

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: (22) Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. (23) They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. (24) I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." (25) The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; (NIV)

Good Morning!

1. Did you wake up this morning needing a fresh start?
2. Was yesterday or last week not one of your finest expressions of the love of Jesus Christ shining in your life?
3. Did you do something, say something or offend someone?
4. Did the enemy of your soul beat you up and tell you how unworthy you are of God's love because of your actions?
5. Did he lie to you and tell you that you were a terrible person, wife, mother or friend?
6. Did he tell you that God was angry with you because God had forgiven you for the same sin over and over again?
7. Did he tell you that God was tired of forgiving you for the same sins?
8. Did he tell you that you just need to quit trying?

I have had days when it seemed like I couldn't do anything right. I would say the wrong thing, react without thinking, get frustrated or angry at my family, say things that weren't pleasing to God...you could say that if I could mess it up that day, then I messed it up.

You know, when you have moments or even, days like this when you lose focus of God, not guarding your tongue, ignoring the nudge of the Holy Spirit to keep you mouth shut. When we lose our focus, not listening the Holy Spirit, we end up doing and saying what we want to or feel like at that moment so that we feel better. We use many excuses to justify what we did..."I was just being honest", "I had a bad day", "well, you ALWAYS do this or that", or out of frustration and/or retaliation...well, you get the picture.

I haven't had one of those days that was that bad lately, but I have moments nearly everyday that I mess up and say or do the wrong thing. Sometimes, you just open your mouth and not think before you speak. I have days that I might have had a bad day at work or somewhere else and it seems to erupt on my family. You know what I mean...they do or say the wrong thing...no biggie but because you are already frustrated...it become a huge issue.

The Holy Spirit is gently nudging you, then poking you and finally, He is practically screaming in your spirit to shut your mouth or to just stop. There are many times that I listen and will be obedient and there are times that...I just let it all out...get it off my chest.

I Corinthians 2:10

but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God (NIV)

After this happens, the Holy Spirit will still check your spirit, convict you and help you to see the error of your ways. At that time, we still have the choice to either repent, make amends to those we hurt or be defiant and refuse. Sometimes, for me, I have to cool off or calm down first before I am willing to listen to the Holy Spirit. When I get to that point, then I feel terribly guilty that I did or said what I did.

I Peter 5:8

Keep a cool head. Stay alert. The Devil is poised to pounce, and would like nothing better than to catch you napping. (Message)

Oh, but the good new is every moment of the day and every morning that you are blessed to wake up...you have another chance to make things right and to choose to do the right thing today. God is a god of..."another chance". I am so thankful that He forgives me when I repent and He helps me to not make the same mistake again. However, if I make the same mistake again...He is right there to correct me, forgive me and give me another chance. God looks at our heart and He knows what is truly in our hearts. The flesh is weak and will be tempted by the enemy. What we can't allow the enemy to do is have a foothold in our lives of guilt and condemnation.

Ephesians 4:26-32
"In your anger do not sin" : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, (27) and do not give the devil a foothold. (28) He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. (29) Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (30) And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. (31) Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. (32) Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (NIV)

Today is a new day for a fresh new, forgiven start. Don't let the enemy convince you otherwise. Walk in peace today with your head held high for you are royalty...you are a child of the King of Kings and the enemy is under your feet.

Romans 16: 20

And God, our source of peace, will soon crush Satan under your feet. The grace of our Lord Jesus be with you.

FYI: I guess only Beth aka sailorcross will be getting one of my "jeweled" handcrafted wooden crosses since no one else signed up for Pay It Forward :-(

Beth, I plan to get busy on your gift in the next few weeks...hopefully, it won't take me 365 days to complete. Please email me with your mailing address so I can ship it to you when it is completed.

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Daily Confession

This prayer was in our church bulletin in 1986 and I have kept it ever since. I love this prayer and I kept it on my sun visor of my car(s) for many, many years especially during my turbulent first marriage, divorce and four years of single parenting...I quoted it daily on my drive to work.

DAILY CONFESSION

Dear Heavenly Father:

• I come boldly to Your throne today to claim my benefits in the Kingdom of God.
• I thank You that You so loved me that You gave Your only Son, that I might have eternal life.
• I thank You that I have received the promise of the Holy Spirit & I do speak in tongues as the Spirit gives me utterance.
• I am healed and I have been given perfect health; for by Jesus' stripes I was healed and I am healed now.
• I have the authority over Satan in my life because I submit myself to God and the devil must flee.
• I thank you, Father, that today Your will gives me prosperity. My every need is met according to Your riches in Christ Jesus. As I give, men give unto me.
• According to Your will, I am the righteousness of God in Christ. I will not cower under condemnation from the enemy.
• I thank you, Father, that You have not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, of love and of a sound mind.
• I thank you, Father, that You have heard my prayer for I ask it in Jesus' name. I have received the benefits of Your will this day with joy and thanksgiving, giving glory unto God.

IN JESUS NAME, AMEN

It brought me a tremendous amount of peace and confidence in Jesus Christ that...

There is nothing that is going to happen to me today

that...You and I can't handle.

Itty Bitty, Tiny...From His Perspective

You have learned so many different things over the course of your life, you have been taught so much in Sunday School, Children's Church and in "big" church...but...sometimes God turns on the light bulb...just a little brighter for some and 200+ watts brighter for others (like me).

I was praying and asking God to speak to me again through His word because of some situations that we were going through that we completely out of our control. I felt the Lord remind me of where we were last year and what He promised me back then, still applies today.

Last year, 2007, was one of the worst years...it was a year full of financial attacks of the enemy, job related stresses, no family time, investment property issues, deadbeat tenants and so much more.

During those times, I felt like I was lost in the sea of stress...bobbing up and down and each time I come up....seemed like the enemy pushed us back down with another attack. I would only have enough time to grab a quick breath of fresh air and then it was down under again.

This was an ongoing thing over the past several years. The enemy tried to beat me up, make me blame myself and/or my husband, tell me the best thing to do was to just run away...leave it all behind and go. The darkness would sweep in like a fog, only it was very black and oh, so lonely.

On December 18th, 2007, I started looking again in Isaiah because God really spoke to me the week before in Isaiah 61. I stopped and started in several places...reading a few scripture in this chapter and then in that chapter. I turned to the back of my old Bible, my old faithful, King James version from childhood....there was a note that I had written one that said "Be renewed...Tap into God's strength...Isaiah 40:28-31. I read 28-31 and then went back to read the entire chapter.

Isaiah 40:28-31
(28) Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. (29) He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. (30)Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; (31) but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (NIV)

I got to verse 10 and 11...I thought about God going before me, his provision for my needs and his protection as my shepherd. Wow! But then, I got to verse 12 and it hit me hard! I read it over and over...I continued reading the chapter but my eyes were repeatedly drawn back to verse 12.

(10) See, the Sovereign LORD comes with power, and his arm rules for him. See, his reward is with him, and his recompense accompanies him. (11)He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.

Verse 12:
Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand, or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens? Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket, or weighed the mountains on the scales and the hills in a balance?

I began to think about that and meditate on that one verse....then other verses came to my mind:

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Psalm 18:35
You give me your shield of victory, and your right hand sustains me; you stoop down to make me great.

Psalm 138:7
Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me.

Psalm 139:10
...even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.

I began to thank God when I think about the awesome size of his hands...(really, I can't even begin to comprehend it) and the size of my problems. He goes on to say in the verses that follow different comparisons of things we can understand (ie. mountains, dust, nations) to the size of His hand...like in verse 15...

Isaiah 40:15
Surely the nations are like a drop in a bucket; they are regarded as dust on the scales; he weighs the islands as though they are fine dust.

He weighs the islands as though they were fine dust....WOW! If the islands are "as fine dust in his hands....then my problems are so tiny that you couldn't even see them with a microscope. All that brought the assurance that NOTHING IS TOO BIG FOR GOD, that nothing is impossible for God and he holds me in the palm of His mighty hand because I am His child and with Him...we will make it!

He reaffirmed to me today that if He said it in the Bible, confirmed it to me in December '07, then it was just as good today as it was then. He let me know that I can REST in Him, for He will take care of me and my family. He will do the same for you!

I'm thankful for God's peace that passeth all understanding. In times of death and loss of family and friends, it is difficult to understand "why". However, God doesn't ask us to understand but to trust Him to know what is best...His Will, not ours. He sees the big picture, where we just see the here and now.

His peace is perfect peace, real peace. In the most difficult times of our lives, we can still have peace that passeth understanding. Why? Because God's Word says so.

May the peace that transcends all understanding be with you today. Have a blessed and thankful Thursday.

Philippians 4:7
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (NIV)