Do Not Lose Heart

2 Corinthians 4:16

So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. (The Message)

I love how the Message Bible puts this verse..."not a day goes by without his unfolding grace"!

Wow!!!

Each one of has experienced trials and troubles in our lives and in our families...if you are alive and breathing...you have been there. So many times, we feel like we can't go on, can't put one foot in front of the other, can't utter another prayer, can't get out of bed and/or just don't want to.

We have felt at times...Why should I keep trying? Why should I care anymore? Does anyone even see that I am hurting or do they even care?

Can you relate to one of these times in your life? You might have experienced more than one...I know that I have.

• If you are having financial troubles, setbacks...it is not the end.
• If you have been lied to and deceived...it is not the end.
• If you have lost your job...it is not the end.
• If you have lost your home...it is not the end.
• If you have been a victim of robbery, identity thief, home invasion...it is not the end.
• If you have a child who is entangled in sin...wrong relationships, failing according to life's standards, refusing to communicate with you or your family, on drugs and/or alcohol or involved in homosexuality...it is not the end.
• If you spouse has walked away from your marriage, chosen someone else over you...it is not the end.
• If you have lost a loved one to death...whether it is a sudden death, suicide or a long illness...it is not the end.
• If you have been in jail or a family member is in jail...it is not the end.
• If you or your family member committed a horrible crime...it is not the end.
• If you have lost or are losing your sight, hearing or even a limb...it is not the end.
• If you have a disabling illness or disease...it is not the end.
• If you are in the depths of depression, battling depression or chemical imbalance that is affecting your way of thinking, feeling, reacting and your relationships...it is not the end.
• If you have learned that you have a terminal illness...it is not the end.
• If you have done things in your life...past or present when you acted foolishly and are mortified by what you did...it is not the end.
• If you are nearing death's door...it is not the end.

It might seem like the end, you might wish it were the end...BUT it is not the end because God is God, He is in control and the end has not come yet...not until God says "this is the end".

We must have faith in our Heavenly Father, trust Him in ALL things and lean on Him completely.

Hebrew 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

I don't know who this is for today but I felt that someone needed to hear this. Be blessed today and you trust in Him.

Personal Attacks Against Your Family

Before I get into the healing that came from a total of 3 years counseling with Pastor Rusty...things had to get worse before they could get better. The attacks of the enemy didn't stop because he saw that I was trying to get the help that I needed but he wanted to kick me while I was down.

I had my days when I cried out to God..."are you there? do you care that we are going through yet another attack? why is this happening? what are we doing wrong? why are you not stopping this mess?" I have been so sick of battle after battle...I just want to catch a break...I wanted to just coast for just a little bit. Is that too much to ask??? I wasn't angry with God because this was all happening but bewildered because He was intervening and stopping it. I was a Child of the King...I was royalty...couldn't I get just a little special treatment?

There was a situation with a neighbor that we became good friends with, we had dinner at their house, they at ours, kids played together daily, I went to the doctor with her, held her hand and talked about going on a vacation together. We had sold them a house 3 years prior to this. Then out of the clear blue...she quit speaking to us...we asked what was wrong...no reply. Her husband wasn't allowed to talk to us either. We thought it was because we had our house up for sale and were moving again. We had sold them our first home together, built a house that ended up being too big for us...too much time maintaining it and the yard...we never had time to do anything as a family anymore...we were either cleaning the house, working in the yard or working to pay for it...it got to where it wasn't any fun anymore...all our blood, sweat and tear...we had subcontracted and build it ourselves...it wasn't worth it anymore. We sold it and bought the house that was next door to our first home because it was going through foreclosure and a great deal. However, after about 1 1/2 years...it was way too small. So...we put it up for sale and were moving back to the subdivision that we originally built in...to a house that was in between the size of the two houses. They had their's up for sale and it didn't sell plus there were some family issues going on and they really wanted to move. It just wasn't happening. We thought they were angry with us because our house was selling again and we were moving. We always had great luck selling our houses...the 1st one...sold and it wasn't on the market yet, the big house sold within two weeks on the market and this house sold within 2 months on the market.

We heard rumors as to what the problem was but nothing concrete. We moved January 3rd, 2003 and didn't have any further contact with our former neighbors/friends. On July 4th, 2003 at straight noon...we had a knock on our door just as we were headed out to a friends get together to celebrate the 4th of July. We were served with a lawsuit! Happy 4th of July!!!!

Needless to say, I was sick to my stomach and the battle was just beginning. They (former neighbor/friends) were suing us for the house that we sold them in May 1999...4 years before. They were grasping for straws...looking for a quick fix to their's not selling and revenge for what....we still don't know. Their statement was that when they got through with us and two realtors...they would have the biggest house in C********* County.

Anyway, now add fear and anxiety to the anger and depression. I was a big mess now. My mind was running in all kinds of directions...what if this, what if that. They were suing the realtor who represented us and the realtor that represented them plus us. Lies, lies and more lies.

They sad thing about our wonderful country....anyone can sue anyone for anything and YOU have to pay to defend yourselves. Unlike, Canada...if you file a frivolous lawsuit and lose...you have to pay the other parties attorney's fees and court cost....NOT IN THE GOOD OLE USA! If we had a law like that...there wouldn't be all the lawsuits that plague our country nor would we have to watch all the attorney commercials on television.

This lawsuit lasted from start to finish....4 different court dates, lots of documentation, many, many hours of research (me and one of the other realtors...did most of our attorney's work for them) and 3 years...the price tag for something like this...$12,000.+. I worked at my job for 3 years to pay for our attorney. If you don't think that will add to your anger....think again. For what???? Nothing! I will talk more about the events of this 3 years in a later entry.

I was boiling on the inside one minute, full of rage then I would be in knots with fear and anxiety. I couldn't help but think what would happen if they won...how would be manage financially, how could we look people in the face in our small town and where is the justice in our system because we knew that we hadn't done anything wrong but innocent people are found guilty everyday.

Next Entry: The Total Forgiveness