Monday, October 26, 2009


This is what my lawn looks like after the first few frosts of the fall. I love to watch the "maze" patterns that appear beginning with the first one. Each additional frost just adds more details in the patterns. It is really amazing to look at.

There are times that I feel this is what my life is giant, confusing maze but the perfect "constant" in my life is Jesus Christ. He takes every step that I make, He is there when I think that I've hit a dead end, He turns me around and gently guides me back the right way and I never have to walk it alone because He is there with me.

In the little maze games we know the plastic one with the tiny steel ball...there is a "prize" point that you aim that says "I won", "I completed the task" and "I didn't let it defeat me".

Well, my "prize" in the maze that I call life is spending eternity with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ living in my mansion on streets of gold when this "crazy" life is over. It will be worth every wrong turn, every dead long as I win the "prize" when it's all over.

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Awwww...Still Basking In Yesterday

Yesterday was the best birthday that I've ever had. The day started out by getting to sleep in, which I did until 10 AM! I got up, ate bacon and eggs for breakfast, got on the computer for a little bit, my mom called, Roger came home...all before I could take my bubble bath.

I got my long, hot bubble bath, did my manicure and pedicure...then, hit the couch in my pjs to watch The Notebook. Now, I didn't take into account talking to family and friends on my birthday when I planned to watch chick flicks all afternoon...I only got one watched but it was so worth it.

My sweet friend, Simone came by and brought me a card with a pedicure gift certificate in it. Oh, yeah!!! I love her!

My other sweet and precious friends, Dorinda and Jackie wanted to take me to lunch but I was enjoying my bubble, hopefully, I will get a rain check on that. :-)

I finally got in the shower at 5 PM to get ready to go out to eat last night. Roger went and picked up the football boys for me and we left shortly thereafter.

We went to the Butcher Shop where that have amazing steaks! Yum, yum! I got the 16 oz. New York Strip, twice baked potato, salad and diet coke. Oh, my!!! Now, the other 1/2 of my steak is in the refrigerator for today's lunch.

Since I am not a big sweet eater...birthday cakes go to waste around, I ordered a piece of New York cheesecake.

Needless to say...I came home stuff but completely satisfied and loving this birthday. Here are a few pictures that we took last night.
Plus, Roger and I are going camping this weekend while Tyler is at their Youth Discipleship Retreat at the same campground. Some time alone with my hubby is always nice and we are supposed to have gorgeous fall weather.

Thank you for all your wonderful birthday wishes yesterday! You guys are the greatest!

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Monday, October 19, 2009

It's My Birthday!!!

Oh, yeah...I'm hitting the big 47 today (20th)!!!

I am writing this at nearly midnight because I am going to sleep in on my birthday!!! Whoo hoo!

After 47 years, I have decided that I deserve a day of pampering for myself. Birthdays and Mother's Day are usually just like any other day for me...I still do the things that needs to be done and go on. But, this year...I've decided that I don't want to do that and I have earned a day for myself. So, here is what my plans are for my birthday.

Sleep in as late as I want to...Roger is getting Ty up for school and my friend, Simone is taking him to school for me. (She's the greatest!)

Get up (whenever that might be) and eat breakfast...whatever I want to eat (no diets or maintenance on your birthday)

Take a long, hot bubble bath and look at my magazines that I never have time to look at

Give myself a manicure and pedicure

Get back into my pajamas

Watch chic sweet friend, Mindy brought me 4 good ones.

Eat whatever for lunch (Sorry, Roger...not cooking you lunch either)

Watch more movies and play many games of Farkle on Facebook

Take a shower, put on make-up and clothes that I haven't been able to wear in 2 years (yeah!)

Pick up football boys after practice

Go wherever my family takes me to eat dinner

Come home and relax until bedtime.

Ahhhhh....sounds like a heavenly day to me.

I am boycotting all housework, cooking, dishes, laundry and my job for the day of October 20th in honor of Jennifer's 47th birthday! Life is good!

I will be thinking about each of you and especially, those who are working tomorrow...well, no...I really want but maybe you will think about me while I'm lounging at home, pampering myself. LOL!!!

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Feelings vs. Truth

In my absence from the blogging world these past week or so, I have been under a great deal of stress with things that are completely out of our control. However, even when we know that they are out of our control...they can still take control of us.

As hard I fought against the stress of the situations, the discouragement and minor depression began to creep in. Add the fact that we didn't see sunshine in Arkansas for over 2 weeks due to rain, rain, rain and very dark, dreary mood was getting very dark.

When I get this way, I don't want to talk to anyone but of course, life continue to move on whether you do or not. You will be put in places and situations that you HAVE to put on a "happy face", smile, talk, laugh and act like all is well with the world...when in fact...IT ISN'T. I find myself doing this and hiding behind a "happy face" so the world doesn't know my business.

If you have never allowed a situation of life to control you, discourage you or cause you to enter into some level of depression...then, you might take your loved ones actions personal when they are not meant to be. When we are with our loved ones, our family, in our own home...we tend to be ourselves without the phony facade. If your loved ones don't understand what you are going through...they might be offended by your actions or lack of.

By Friday, I wasn't smiling but functioning day by day. When I was alone, I was deep in thought and the war was raging in my mind between what I was "feeling" and the truth.

I went to Jonesboro to take my oldest son, Brandon, his jacket and shirt he left at the house earlier in the week and this gave me plenty of time alone to just think.

During this entire "dry" time in my life, I have filled my mind with praise and worship music, prayer and some reading of the Word. I can't focus very well during this time to spend much time, I don't. I would go to bed at night with my iPod playing through my headphones...filling my sleep with praise and worship music. However, I would wake up the next day in the same "funk" as I went to sleep in.

Driving back from Jonesboro, I had a notebook with me, so I wrote down words that described how I was "feeling" that very moment. I started to scan the page and post it but too lazy to go do, here is what I wrote down. As I was writing the words down on the left side of the page of how I was feeling, my thoughts would immediately go opposite and I wrote these down on the right side of the page.

Physical vs. Spiritual...Feelings vs. Truth

Beat down / My joy comes from the Lord

Great sadness / My hope is in Him

Overwhelmed / I put my trust in Him

Defeated / When I am weak, He is strong

Angry / Be angry and sin not


Anxious / Be anxious about nothing

Minor Depression / I am more than a conqueror

Doubtful / Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean
not unto your own understanding

Tired & Drained / I will give you rest

Alone / I will never leave you nor forsake you

Emotionally dry / He is the fountain of living water

As my flesh was screaming out my weaknesses, my spirit was screaming out the Truth...God's Word.

Did I immediately feel better? No!

I sought the advice of a very dear friend, wise counsel, godly person that afternoon and they confirmed what I already knew. That there will be times in our lives that we go through dry spells, when we feel alone, that God is not there, when our prayers aren't being heard, when we feel there is no hope for our situation BUT, that is not the TRUTH. The truth is...God is actively working in my life, my family, my situation and He is still right there by my side and at times, He is carrying me when I am to weary to walk on my own.

This time, I didn't feel that my prayers weren't being answered or that God wasn't there with me but, I knew I was in a dry season. This is the biggest difference that I've seen in this time and other attacks from the enemy in the past.

It was confirmed to me that I knew the truth and I was refusing to buy into the lies of the enemy during this period of my life. Now, I just have to wait until my flesh grabs a hold of the truth.

By the way, I am feeling much better starting on Saturday. I still have my "quiet" moments but the joy of the Lord is returning to my flesh.

Nehemiah 8:10b
Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength."

Psalm 33:20
We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield

Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

II Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

Psalm 39:7
"But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you.

Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Hebrews 13:5b
God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

John 7:38

Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him."

Romans 8:37
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Please pray for me as the stress has begun to affect my heart again. It is skipping beats more frequently and makes me tired easily.


Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Pure Joy!

There is so much going on in my life right now that I am very distracted, overwhelmed and a little gloomy. I keep blaming the weather...rain, clouds, dark and dreary days for my feelings but honestly, it is more than that and I know it. So, since my forum on this blog has always been honesty...then, here it is...I am battling a minor amount of depression. I can call it minor because I have suffered the major and this is no where near that. Nearly every time that I have ever battled with depression it has always been situational and this time is no different.

God is in control of all things and that includes my life, my situations, my problems and HE CARES ABOUT EACH ONE OF THEM!

I will post more later on some things that I can share but right now...I don't have the time nor energy to do so.

So...on a much lighter note. I wanted to share some pictures of my family with you. Most of these are of my youngest son, Tyler, who is 15 and in the 10th grade. He is playing high school football and is doing very well. In these pictures you will see a couple with my oldest son, Brandon and my mother...aka...Nanny. They both came to Tyler's last JV game this past Monday night.

It is nothing short of pure joy to have my family around me and I am filled with pride when I watch my son play football. I truly love my family with every fiber of my being.

Tyler is #12 in either the white jersey (away games) or the blue jersey (home games). This is several games combined together of both Friday night football (Varsity) and Monday night football (Jr. Varsity).

If you can't tell my these pictures and my photo tags....I love that boy and we are so proud of him.

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Picking Up The Pieces

Genesis 50:20
You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.

I spent most of Monday and Monday night...picking up the pieces of my life and a shattered Christian testimony.

I admit that last week was one of the most trying weeks that I've had in a long time. I must have been "way" out of practice because I failed miserably.

It started with a disgruntled spirit and when that wasn't dealt grew and festered. That disgruntled spirit was just the cultivated ground for more bad seeds to be sown.

As the week went on and my sins were allowed to grow...I choose not to deal with them because I was in such a bad mood, I was in the middle of a storm, didn't take cover but just keep walking into the middle of it...things got worse.

On Wednesday, we received bad news about a situation that was totally out of our control but yet, it made mef eel helpless all the more. That sent me scrambling for a plan and answers.

By Thursday, I was at a boiling point and the final straw was place on my pile of garage and all came crashing down...after it exploded all over certain people. I totally lost all control.

Friday, we were well on our way to a plan of action to help with one situation and little did we know but that plan will be the answer to many other areas of our lives that our hearts have longed for. (But, you couldn't have told me that right then and had me believe it). I was still so confused on which plan to choose because they all looked good, sounded good.

You would think that it stopped there but it didn't. I allowed it to push me into a state of depression and I didn't want to talk to anyone...PERIOD...not even, God. I allowed it to torment me all weekend and cause a huge amount of friction between the only one that I have in my corner except for God and that is my hubby. We were at war with each other...rather, I was at war and he was just on the battlefield because he never gets upset...which, makes me even madder. lol

Monday, here came another straw adding back to the already unstable pile and another tremor erupted. The tremors continued all day and all night.

I couldn't sleep that night because I was angry, depressed, hurt, searching for answers to a situation that came to us in the middle of all this mess...I needed peace and answers.

I spent Monday night from 12 AM - 6 AM working at my desk for my job, listening to my praise and worship music and praying.

When you apply the Word of God to every situation...the right plan become crystal clear. You can't ask for God's blessing and deliberately do the opposite of His Will. I knew that all along but I needed a reminder.

I walked away Tuesday morning with the answers that I needed, a submissive spirit about the situation that had arisen and the conflict it was causing with my husband, I had a sense of calm, peace and I knew what I had to do from that moment on.

I had to apology to several people, talk all the details of what God revealed to me during the night to my husband and we came to a complete agreement. I am left to pick up the piece of my shattered testimony and move forward taking a very valuable lesson with me.

We are once again united, at peace and it forced us to step out in blind faith, trusting God that His direction was the only way to go and that He would make a way where there seemed to be no way. In the world's eyes...we would be foolish but God's way is never foolish or wrong.

Far away in the depths of my spirit tonight
Rolls a melody sweeter than psalm
In celestial like strains it unceasingly falls
O'er my soul like an infinite calm
Peace, peace, wonderful peace
Coming down from the Father above!
Sweep over my spirit forever, I pray
In fathomless billows of love!

What a treasure I have in this wonderful peace
Buried deep in the heart of my soul
So secure that no power can mine it away
While the years of eternity roll!
I am resting tonight in this wonderful peace
Resting sweetly in Jesus' control
For I'm kept from all danger by night and by day
And His glory is flooding my soul!

And I think when I rise to that city of peace
Where the Author of peace I shall see
That one strain of the song which the ransomed will sing
In that heavenly kingdom will be

Ah, soul! are you here without comfort and rest
Marching down the rough pathway of time?
Make Jesus your Friend ere the shadows grow dark & accept of this peace so sublime!

**Life is good when you listen to the voice of Jesus whispering in your ear, heart and spirit. And, stepping our in blind faith is both scary and exhilarating!**

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Saturday, October 3, 2009

~This Too Shall Pass~

This has been a very stressful week full of blindsides, anxiety, tension, anger, problems, worry, situations out of our control and situations caused by others that could have been avoided.

I am so thankful that my God has been right there in the midst of it all, even, when I have not reacted like I should have. He still loves me, forgives me, watches over me, provides for us and protects us...He is working all things out for my good because I love Him and serve Him. Yes, I have had to ask for forgiveness many times this week and He has forgiven me and set my feet back on higher ground.

I found this song that I shared earlier this week on my blog but I wanted to post it again today. It is called..."This Too Shall Pass" by Yolanda Adams.

This is the first time that I have participated in TSMSS in a long time but what better way than to share the good news that no matter what you are experiencing...God is right there with you and He will carry you safely to the other side. For more, TSMSS...visit Amy at Signs, Miracles and Wonders.

Romans 8:28 (NIV)
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

And, I am thankful that this too shall pass and I will once again be happy, relaxed and at peace but until then...I am clinging to my Lord.

**Scroll down and pause my music first**

Have a wonderfully blessed day!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

It Goes Up, Down and Eventually, Levels Out Again!

What is it that does all this? Well, there are probably several things that you can think of in your life that does this, but for me....

It's the storms....swells of the sea
It's the emotions...anger, joy, panic, disbelief and peace

After having a really bad Monday and Tuesday this week, I was determined when I woke up yesterday morning to make the best of what I had to work with and be content.

I absolutely loved working outside all day. I think that I got more work done than I normally do inside. :-)

There is just something so invigorating about being outside in the fresh, cool, crisp fall temperatures with a slight breeze. The breeze was so gentle and my papers stayed put on the table. I am thankful that I didn't have to weigh everything down or chase papers all over the backyard. That might have taken the joy out of being outside, huh?

I was settling into my contentment mode and making great progress on my paperwork...until the bad news came.

I received news yesterday that was a total blindside. Immediately the discontentment, fear, panic, anger, disbelief...all rose up inside me...all at the same time.

You see, we have been cruising along over the past two years with only a few slight bumps in the road of life. We have been challenged with some situations but God worked them all out and we moved on with life.

As we have watched many people that we know suffer with life and different situations...we have been moving along peacefully, praising God for our blessings and seeing what we could do to help others. Being thankful that it wasn't us for a change. We were under attack of the enemy for 7 years straight. It thought many times that I would lose my mind if we didn't catch a break.

Finally, two years ago...the swells calmed down and it was a smooth, calm sea that we were sailing on...finally! The winds picked up a time or two that made small waves but no real storm manifested itself from it. Again, we were so thankful that God was seeing us through and we were finally catching our breath.

The enemy had been silent now for about two years and he loves to give you a false sense of calm in your life. One that if you aren't careful, could become"look how well I'm doing", "look at us and what we have", "see how I am taking care of my life, family and business". That is another way for him to trip you up because we are nothing without Christ. We are nothing without Him and never will be.

There was always a slight thought in the back of my mind saying from time to time..."when is the enemy going to pull a surprise attack", "when will he blindside us", "I know that he hasn't forgotten about us" but, I thanked God for His provision and protection on our family, dismissed the thoughts and went on with life.

Yesterday, the attack came in the form of a was totally unexpected and without warning. We didn't see it coming at all. Were we too comfortable in our lives? I don't think so. We were prideful in our thinking that we were causing all the good that was coming our way? Absolutely not. Were we nieve in thinking that the attacks weren't on the horizon? No, because I knew as long as we were serving God...we had a target on our lives and he would attack again.

So, what do you do when it comes? My emotions went right back up after calming down to settle in on contentment yesterday, the panic set in immediately..."what are we going to do?", "how should be handle this" and so mind was racing. I am the emotional one and my husband is the calm one.

I called him and told him about the bad news that we received. He calmly said "I'm not going to worry about it until I know more about it. We need to call and see what this is all about". He said "I can't tell you not to worry because you probably will anyway, but I am not".

I stepped back, took a deep breath and prayed.

God, you are bigger than this news, this situation. You haven't brought us this far to leave us now. Your Word says "no weapon formed against us shall prosper, the plans that you have for me is to prosper and not to harm me, plans of hope and a future" and you also said "that the enemy intended to harm me with this attack but God, you will use it for my good". I am trusting You, Lord to handle this situation, guide us in the direction that You would have us to go and give us peace in the midst of the storm.

Today, I will be working on a game plan for this situation. I don't believe in being stupid, ignoring a problem and not researching all my options ahead of time. I will be fully prepared for the counter attack and will march forward in power and in might with God leading the way.

This too shall pass! Watch and listen to this beautiful song that I just!

I can't imagine living one day without Jesus Christ in my life. I don't do people make it day to day, in the world that we live it...WITHOUT JESUS CHRIST in their lives? Who do they cling to in the storms, who do they cry out to in the night, when their in pain, when the pain in so unbearable and they...... don't have the answers. WHO? HOW? I can't imagine a single day without JESUS CHRIST IN MY LIFE!!!

Isaiah 54:17 (Message)
But no weapon that is formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue that shall rise against you in judgment you shall show to be in the wrong. This [peace, righteousness, security, triumph over opposition] is the heritage of the servants of the Lord [those in whom the ideal Servant of the Lord is reproduced]; this is the righteousness or the vindication which they obtain from Me [this is that which I impart to them as their justification], says the Lord.

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Genesis 50:20 (Message)
Don't you see, you planned evil against me but God used those same plans for my good, as you see all around you right now--life for many people.

Have a wonderfully blessed day!


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