The Wedding

Planning our wedding was actually fun compared to the first time that I got married. Our parents were not involved in anyway this time...it was all about what we wanted and what we could pay for. Our parents paid for both of our first weddings, so the second one was on us....I think that is just an "unspoken" rule, right?

Remember I told you that we did everything backwards, well this was no different. Roger took me to pick out my wedding dress...I tried some on, he looked at them and gave me his opinion. When we found one that we liked, Roger bought the dress for me. We went to picked out our own wedding bands together, looked at houses together, planned every aspect of our wedding...we did together. It was very relaxing and fun...if you can believe that. The entire planning of the wedding was all done together down to the smallest decision.

At first, we butted heads on what kind of wedding we were going to have...Roger wanted a quickie...justice of the peace type wedding...small with just immediate family and I wanted a real church wedding. This disagreement went on for several days and we both were standing our own ground on this one. His reason for the "quickie" wedding was...we've been there and done that already...so why go through all that again. My reason, (which by the way, won out)...was...yes, we have both had the whole church wedding thing before but this time it will be different for both of us. You live in a totally different state and the same people will not be at this wedding that was at our first wedding. BUT, my biggest reason was....if we ever had a child of our own...I want him/her to have family pictures of his/her parents getting married in the traditional way. I told him that his daughters would have the pictures of his and their mom's wedding and my son would have the pictures of mine and his dad's wedding. I felt very, very strongly about wanting traditional wedding pictures and memories to share with a child of our own...a child that we did not know if we would ever have or not. Well, being the compassionate, sweet, kind, loving and sentimental guy that Roger is....that won him over and he consented to having a church wedding.

After much discussion in regards to where we were going to live and go to church....together, we decided it would be best if we chose a place where we did not know anyone and get a start fresh. This way, we would have our new friends and would find a church that would be our church...not my friends and my church or his friends or his church. We began looking at houses half way between where he currently lived and where I had lived all my life. We purchased our first home just a couple of weeks before the wedding and Roger got all settled in. Two days before the wedding, Roger, Papa (his dad) and his brothers began to move most of my furniture and belongings to our new home. Roger's family was staying with him in our new home and would stay until Sunday, the day after the wedding, before leaving going back to South Carolina.

We had a discussion back early in our relationship as to what type of church would we go to...we came from completely opposite backgrounds. Roger was raised Methodist, married into the Lutheran church and when moved from South Carolina to Tennessee...he was an elder in the Presbyterian Church. I was born and raised Baptist and when I was 19 years old...started going to the Assembly of God church, which I later joined, in the town that I lived. So, churches were a big topic of discussion. It was funny how we narrowed down the possibilities of where we would visit once we got married...it was the process of what do you not want to be the worst and worked toward the one that we were both willing to try out. But until that time, we went to my church at the Assembly of God. After we were married, we did try out several demoninations and went to one church for several months before I could not stand it anymore. I told Roger that I felt so spiritually dead and he asked me where did I want to go and I told him First Assembly of God. We have been there ever since:)

This is so precious, when one Sunday, Roger and his daughters came to church with me and being that it was different than what they were used too....his youngest daughter was intrigued by the people who raised their hands in worship during our praise and worship time. She went home and told her mom "it was so neat, Mom, because all those people kept trying to reach up and touch Jesus". Through the eyes of a child....that is what we are doing in the spirit...reaching out to touch Jesus.

The setting for our wedding was a Saturday afternoon at 2 PM, at the First Assembly of God in my hometown. It was a beautiful, sunny winter day on February 23, 1991. My matron of honor was my friend and the wife of the guy that introduced us and my bridesmaid was my now ex-sister-in-law. Roger's best man was his father and his older brother, Marty, as his groomsman. We used my best friend's daughter and my soon-to-be new niece, Leigh Anne, who was 3 years old as flower girls and my 4 year old son, Brandon, was the ring bearer. My sister, Lana, played the organ for us. Roger's mother and younger brother, Rex, are florist, who brought every piece of greenery and fresh flowers in the winter from South Carolina in a van with the air conditioner on. They nearly froze but the flowers were beautiful. I let "Nana" pick out and design my bouquet and all the other flowers. They did a fantastic job! My only brother, Jeff, and Roger's brother, Marty, served as our ushers and candle lighters. My brother also gave me away to become Roger's wife. My wonderful preacher, Bro. Bob officiated the ceremony. He along with his wife, Debi provided the music. Roger's daughters, Sommer & Ryan, along with his niece, Ashley and my niece, Ashley were all escorted out after the mothers by Roger's nephews, Perry and Blake and my nephew, Bret. We tried to incorporate nearly all family members into our wedding so how.

We wanted to honor our parents at our wedding, so as I entered the church being escorted by my brother...it was a very emotional time for me because my daddy was not there to see me finally happy and to give his little girl away....again:) The picture that was made of me coming down the aisle looks like I am very unhappy because I am crying but it was because of daddy and no other reason. I stopped and gave my mother a single white rose and kissed her. When Roger & I exited...I stopped and gave his mother a single white rose and a kiss too.

The song that is playing now, "Always" by Atlantic Star was the song that Roger swears is 2 hours long because we lit our unity candle during the song and "gazed" into each other's eyes for the remainder of the song. It was a very long song....almost 5 minutes. It was just about to get comical...we started talking to each other to pass the time. But, it is a great song. We also had "Endless Love" by Lionel Richie and Diana Ross.

Our wedding day was magical! The best part of the entire ceremony was when Bro. Bob pronounced us...Mr. and Mrs. Roger W*********. (We agreed when I started this blog that we wouldn't mention last names...so those that know us...you can complete the name and for those who don't...I'm sorry but I have to honor Roger's wishes and this was his only stipulation.)

It was small but yet large enough, formal but yet not too formal, relaxing, enjoyable and nothing was rushed. It was so special because we planned every aspect of it and it just said "us". We got to spend plenty of time with our friends after the wedding....it was just perfect! The groom's cake was chocolate with chocolate icing...it has two tennis rackets that were crossed and it said "Advantage Roger"! I had a beautiful, three tier bride's cake with sparking cider in beautiful crystal goblets that Roger's mom gave us. It was funny because on the wedding video...you could hear and see me asking Roger..."what's in this glass?" I thought surely it was white wine and I was about to die...total panic. His mother overheard me and said "it's ok, Jennifer....it's only cider" Whewwwwwwwwww!!!!!!

The other funny thing was....my baby boy's shoes were too small and did not have time to exchange them...so he is in one of the pictures below with his shoes off...he kept saying "my feet hurt". God love him!

My cousin along with the help of my brother and few others...decorated Roger's Ford Explorer...really, really good! I thought he was going to have a stroke. They took the aisle markers and attached them to the grill on the front...looked just like a casket spray!! So after we left the church, we drove 20 miles and he had to stop to wash his truck, well, actually, scrub it...after we went to Wal-Mart to buy stuff to clean it with...on the way to our honeymoon!!!!!

We had rented a mountain cabin that was like a bed and breakfast for our honeymoon. They would bring homemade breakfast with fresh fruit and juice. It was a 6 hour drive to the cabin and it was the first day of Desert Storm. We talked all the way to the cabin and listened to the radio but we always kept going back to was how enjoyable our wedding was. It was just like we had hoped and planned it would be. The was one of the happiest days of my life.....it was magical with my prince charming, the love of my life, my heavenly knight in shining armor, my helper and my best friend by my side. I love you, Roger!

I love the wording in the different translations...KJV, NIV and The Message

Genesis 2:24 - For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. (NIV)

Genesis 2:24 - Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh. (Message)

Matthew 19:4-6 - "Haven't you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ (5)and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? (6)So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” (NIV)

Matthew 19:4-6 - And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, (5) And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? (6) Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (KJV)

Mini Wedding Album....yes, I cut my bangs the week before the wedding....too short....but it was 17 years ago...go ahead, laugh...I do:) My, my...we looked young! Sorry, but my scanned pictures don't have good color quality.

Brandon is the little boy in the pictures, Roger's daughters...my new stepdaughters, Sommer & Ryan and my mother with Brandon. You can click on the picture to enlarge it.






Next Entry: The Honeymoon